"You’re wrong" "It doesn’t work like that" "I don’t agree with you"
These were just some of the
challenges I received on the first morning of a three day training programme I
was delivering. All came from one participant. She was very loud, assertive and began to
dominate proceedings. The more she
challenged the more my other participants became quieter – especially the
Japanese guy on the front table who had not uttered a word.
Why was my good course material
being ripped apart by this lady? Why was
she so unhappy with the training? I
decided to talk to her during the lunch break.
“Unhappy? I’m not unhappy. The course is excellent. I always like to
argue with the trainer. It’s how I learn
best. It’s how we do things in Israel.”
Over the last four years with MTP
I have had the privilege to deliver training programmes to different companies
in all corners of the world. I am
becoming more culturally aware, but I do not profess to be a cultural
expert. Cultural understanding is also a
subject that a lot of my course participants want to learn about, especially
when we cover topics such as Business Partnering in international
companies. I was therefore intrigued by
an article I saw in the Harvard Business Review (December 2015 edition) –
“Getting to Si, Ja, Oui, Hai, and Da"
The piece by Erin Meyer
(Professor at INSEAD) was focused on managing cultural differences when
negotiating and was full of anecdotes where things have not gone to plan due to
cultural misunderstandings. She
identifies five rules of thumb for negotiating with someone whose cultural
style of communication differs from yours.
She also presents a cultural map which has resonated well with my
experiences of training different nationalities. For example my Israeli course participant
would be placed perfectly in the top-left!
Not everyone fits a national
stereotype (life is not that simple), but I can clearly recall many course
participants from different countries fitting nicely into Mayer’s cultural
map. The Dutch finance graduate
challenging the business strategy with the senior guest speaker, ignoring
hierarchical norms you might expect in other countries. Or the joke I have with one of my colleagues
that running a course in Korea is like going to speak to yourself for a week.
Another part of Mayer’s article on
Trust caught my eye. At MTP we talk
about Trust a lot when we run programmes on Business Partnering. We have always liked the model presented by
Green & Howe in their book The
Trusted Advisor Fieldbook who identify four trust drivers of Credibility, Reliability, Intimacy and Self Orientation. When discussing Trust with course participants
I have been asked are all drivers equally important in all situations and for all
cultures. Until now I have not had a
satisfactory response, but Mayer cites research looking at Cognitive and Affective
Trust which might have some of the answers.
Cognitive trust is very close to Credibility + Reliability – it comes from the head. Affective
trust arises from feelings of emotional closeness, empathy, or friendship and
links especially well with Intimacy
and to an extent Self Orientation –
it comes from the heart.
Mayer highlights how in business
situations different nationalities may put an emphasis more on Cognitive Trust
(Germany, UK USA). For example, the
American culture has a long tradition of separating the emotional from the
practical. Mixing the two could create a
conflict of interest and is viewed unprofessional. Whereas in most developing and emerging
countries, negotiators are unlikely to trust their counterparts until an
Affective connection has been made.
Mayer writes that in these markets you need to build an emotional
connection as soon as possible, investing time in meals and drinks and showing
your human side. In China, for example,
this type of bond may take a long time to build. Eventually you won’t just have a friend;
you’ll have a deal.
Having enjoyed the article am now
looking forward to reading Mayer’s book, TheCulture Map (Public Affairs, 2014) to
see what other cultural insights I can glean and will come back to this blog
with a book review in the near future.
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